It's been awhile since i felt this way. Even tho i had everything i wanted, the things i want the most will never definitely be the one that i could get hold of. People might think it's so precious since i can't get hold of those feelings, but in actual facts, i had once felt it, but lost it due to some reason.
This kind of feeling come and go, when it comes, i tried to get hold of it, but i sorta like not-so-dare to get hold of it once it going off. Perhaps, this is one of the thing that humans lack of, which is flexibility.
I really don't want this kind of life continues, where it's only half attached, i want it to be more consistent, more flexibility, more open minded, and lastly, it's more enjoyable. Not because i'm sellfish that i wanted my life to be the best compared to others, but it's the life that i found it enjoyable since it's the life that i'm living in.
And again, who will ever understand ? no one....in the end..
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