How true it could be ?

Just only read back all my journal entries, i realize...even tho it reflect what happened on that time, but how true it is ?

It's not that i was lying on the things i wrote, it's just that...it means more than what i meant, that can't put into words. It's true that you'll never understand as long as you're not there, as long as you're not the one experience it, and as long as you're not the one who can be considered as "victim".

You know what, getting all the messages, talk back to all you girls, ignoring some of the questions. Those step were necessary, just imagine what will happen if i just have to answer and quote back every single thing that i have asked about, and imagine what would happen if everytime i spoke the truth. Wait, the truth about you, not me. I've been always straightforward and blunt on my action. Nothing more, nothing less.

Reading back over and over and i think, there are still alot of things that cannot be told, said, or even mentioned. Since it might be used again in the future for no particular reason, like what happened just now. Sometimes it's true that, everyone keeps a secret, and it's best it remains a secret. Well, what's so bad about someone keeping things a secret ? It's their life, and it's up to them to keep it for their own sake,or maybe for everyone's who related's sake.

As mentioned, things that never being told not necessary to be bad, but then again, there are alot of things that you shouldn't keep since every one knows about it, what's more you really DONT have to lie about it when people confirmed knowing somethin you called it a "Secret". There's always a better way doing things than to cover it with lies.

People who does this, i usually use the term as "nonsense", rather than bullshit. Personally i myself thinks bullshits is abit of insulting, nonsense would sound much better, at least that's what i thought.

There's alot of ways to define people who always talk about nonsense, first of all, those who talk about something where just cross their minds, without even knowing what's going on. WAIT, i meant, without knowing what's going on WITH EVERY ASPECT ! Com'mon people, don't spit up something that you're not even sure, wait..even if you're sure don't JUST SPIT it out like that, not only it might create confusion, but some misunderstanding, which is totally UNECESSARY ! So please, use your freakin brain that you have been givin since birth to think before you speak you morons.

Secondly, Nonsense people, as mentioned they don't use brains much, will try to plan something out of nothing. In short, they always failed in their planning, not to mentioned it will most like not turn out the way they want. Wait, did i mentioned it'll never goes well ? It's been so long that i already know that, they will never be on time, and people who're not good with time, they will never be good in planning. It's so true that you might wanna cut your balls out and eat it.

Third, it's a combination of liars and try to act cool people. Wait, they're still in Nonsense category people. Unlike those Conman or Coolguy, who at least they're smart. These nonsense people are freakin stupid when it comes to bluff people and trying to act cute. C'mon, if i have a hammer in my hand and got nothing to lose, i will freaking break your head off imediately to verify how empty your brain is. Enuff says.

In short, don't trust Nonsense people, they have no sense have all.

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Back to what i really wanted to write, in this world there will be no truth (Not referring to scientific terms or maths stuff), i'm talking about people. They might be a monk or paster or whatever they called themself, but their heart. You never know.

People are the one who decides what's right or wrong, people are the one who create words, people, are the who goes on majorities when it comes to feelings, people..are the one who decides on their on faith, and people, who decides on who will lead, and who will follow.

Sometimes i really wonder, how true is it for this world now ? you might be wondering what i'm talkin about. Let's see, we'll start with...how this world is formed..wait, that was too back away, or maybe i'll just say how ABC is actually invented, and why does words like HATE and LOVE exist in the first place.

For those Angels, they will think "Purifying the land, and eliminate all the devil, and treat everyone good" is a Good thing they do, and how they show their own love. While the devil, they will have to KILL all the angels, maintain their kind and treat those others whatever they want, in order to show them they exist. But wait, is that even wrong?

If you say is wrong, who were at fault actually ? Are those water meant for you to drink in the first place ? Are those vegies, chickens, and tree to be chop down just for your sake ? AND if to look into a bigger picture, is this world where you called earth, is somewhere where you can call it's your territory and named whatever you want like AMERICA or MALAYSIA ? Those are freaking nonsense. Those planet are not even called Venus or Mars or whatsoever, why would you even wanna create money and jail when people are actually meant to do whatever they want in the first place ?

People now are freaking materialize, even tho they are not, but they still IS. It's not that people are at fault for discovering something new and named it whatever they want, it's just that it's not something that you SHOULD brag about and tries to act the almighty as you want. I don't really care if you're a GOD or PRIME MINISTER. No matter how you put into it, you're still only An existence, something that exist mainly for the reason of existing. It's true that the Universe or milky way is big, but what if it's actually as small as a single DNA cell in our body, that ends once a person ends ? What if we're actually inside someone's single cell, and there's actually zillions of them multiply by infinity ?

Then you might think it's not necessary to think about it. Then please tell me, what are you reason on living ? Study, live, work, get married, have kids, be successful and die in grave ? Then what if after u die ?

People have been livin this kind of life for GENERATIONS, for what ? No one can actually answers it. You might have, but it has no ending and proper meaning if you're bein asked about it.

In short, there's no truth or true stuff in this world, things like those is just like candies to make babies happy. And please, i'm definitely not living in this world to do all those kind of things, i'll just be like everyone else, do whatever i want.

How far can it be ?

Sometimes i wonder if people would read back their own journal years ago regarding their life, and love relations.

I would, most of the time, that i would think whether it's necessary or not to say something, or to do something. But for most of the time, i think it's nonsense to do all those things. Wait, did i say nonsense ?

Anyway, i'm really getting tired of arguing on the things that i don't even think about it..or more like it doesn't really matter. I know it might matters to you and all, but is it necessary to bring it up each and everytime just because of some small things ? This sucks~

This is exactly what i meant..

You see, there's a reason why people wouldn't want to get serious in their relationship, of course i'm not saying everyone will have the same situation, but people like me who sometimes regret over a decision that has been made, even tho everyone says it's the correct one.

I don't know why, i think the time has come to a near end, that my life shall change dramatically to another curves, where people will not even realize how much this will change the people around me, if i change.

i'm frustrated and annoyed by people around me who never even try to use their brain even before they thinking. Not to mentioned they don't even know how to respect and to learn to think how important the reason for their living. Let's just say that, this world is all screwed up actually.