forbidden love..

Since it wasn't right from the start

why am i still holding onto it anyway

it wasn't mine to begin with

it wasn't a hand i could hold on to

i was wrong in the first place

and so, i guess i should accept that i'm at fault

i shouldn't be even doing this

i shouldn't, make her feel guilt

and so, i think i should not make someone like her

to feel at fault.

And so

Now i know why

there are times, we have to leave the person

we love the most...

Fall for you..

Your smile is facinating

Your voice, are so captivating

Your personality is extraordinary

Your eye, are gorgeous

Everything is so perfect

And I knew right ahead when i first saw you

that, you're the one for me.

Except that, i can never be with you.

near end ?

I can't believe my life is in a turning in a place where it get worst, and guess what...it could get even worst than it is what it is...

Not to mentioned my own love life is already giving me so much depression, interms of family...career, and financial wise, not to mention friends and so forth..everything...is in it's breaking states now..i wonder how long i can hold on to this without breaking down..

Being in-a-one-sided love is hard, as of now...my tears really pushing itself hard, as tho it is telling me they need a shoulder, and a hug so much now...

halo

I saw, an Angel today...

you, are the one i miss..

It's hard to wait around for something you know might never happen; bt it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want.

i'll walk with you..

Started with a glimpse
it goes with a shy encounter
continue with a rest on a shoulder
viewing the sunrise under the roof
melted in the coldest night
and have the sweetest dream.

In this path of life
Doesn't matter if you're walking fast, or slow;
i'll walk with you.
And if there's something ahead of you blocking your way;
i'll put my life, clearing it out for you
even at it's worst that i wasn't allowed to walk side by side with you
no worries, just go ahead without me..walk towards your dream,and grab hold of what you want.
And no matter how the stories will ends for me, i will just right behind you, just to make sure, i could be there when you need me again.

Wished, that our fairytale would come true...one day..

Just because everything seems to be different, doesn't mean it has changed

How ever i do, is not the same
Whatever i say, sounds different
Which ever i act, doesn't make any sense
as i walk down this un-changeable path
my heart for you, could never changed

I'm not even sure, if life was suppose to live this way
i can't even be sure, what future lies ahead of me
after swimming through the heart-ache vast-sea for the psat 2 month
and going through hell for the past 2 weeks
i realize, loving someone...isn't as simple as it seems anymore...
i do..still miss you...

where do i stand , you asked..

I often realize
when i did something wrong to you
i tried to apologize so much
from the bottom of my heart
yet, you're so reluctant to hear
that in the end it took you forever just to forgive me
as if i'm begging for forgiveness,
as if, everything is my fault
you never gave me a chance to explain
you never explain why exactly are you so mad
you never, gave myself a chance to understand why it happened
you never, tried to understand..at all...

but...when things happens the other way
you started to changed,
claiming that you do not wish it happened
saying that you regreted it
wishing that i would forgive you
in the end
you never tried to understand as well on why am i so mad
you never, try to understand that as time pass by, things weren't as easy as just "i'm sorry"
and you never, think...that no one could ever put back a shattered heart anymore...
-A voice, from a heart of my friend-

i want..to protect..

It's amazing how magical one's smile is,it could miracle-ly wiped away all kind of worries and discouragement that almost brought down someone.

This smile, i hope i could protect it forever...

h3ll ?

Without knowing
it seems that i have drift of the way
where things, definitely out of shape
it's been month, since i struggle
at what i love the most

And now
it seems that the things
has gotten even worst
as tho i went through h3ll
until i could kill myself anytime soon..

i wonder
if i really could get through this life of mine.

somewhere, in da <3

I never knew
it hurt so much
when you try not to look at someone
that you're dying to see.

I guess, that prove the person
still stay in a special place
somewhere, in the heart.

the wall

When someone put up a wall, usually they're the one whois under depression the most,they would still smile as much, but never from their heart,just simply to not let others to worry.

At times, the wall was just to keep people away, in a way to tell that they'll be fine by themself.
Others would usually ignore all these walls as they walk by, In actual fact, the person itself do hope that someday,that there's someone who came across in their life would brave climb over the wall, or break it to share their feelings.

I wonder, was it wrong for me to break all these walls for the past few years, till it would be so heart-ache with just a glance of it now.