I have changed ?

Always looking forward seeing you, trying my best to be at place. Going on best effort so that my heart is around eventhough i am tired.

Everyday, everymoment. I think of you when i'm free at work. Thinking of what to do at the end of the day, with you. No matter how tired i am, no matter how moody, or depress i am from work. It will never effect the reason for me to find you, cause i need to see you.

All these while i have been a person who is not organize enough. But now, i've learnt how to prioritize.

When i work, i focus at work; But when i'm on break or lunch, i think of you.
When i drive, i focus at driving; But when the road is clear, i will hold on you.
When i'm exhausted, i rest; but when you're around at the same time, i try be by your side.
When i'm out with you, i put away my tiredness, my moodyness, my worryness, and my sellfishness. All i had in mind, is to let you enjoy as much as you can.

On Monday, i was ignoring the fact that i'm tried, and go out walking with you.
On Tuesday, i ignore the fact that i am depress from work, and try my best to be out with you.

But, today...after hours of working with sleepie and stressful mood, all i asked for is to rest earlier at home. And i cant even chat with a cheerful you, instead...i am not resting even tho i am home.

You said i don't give much emotion when i not seeing you...and when i already told you i'm tried. Even tho i tried not to let you think that way by giving you a short call after work. It still happen.

You said i am not used to be what i am. Well, that's because things changed, and i don't see it changed to the bad side. As i still love you as much as i do.

You SmS me thought i weren't even gonna sms you. That message just made my day the worse, as i was being positioned that way even tho i tried so hard.

Please baby, don't let me worry all the time, i would bring you out if i knew you were moody cause of the heat. But sometimes, things won't get better if we don't help each other. How hard is it to do things that you don't like just to make things better ?

That reminds me, i hate living in this house, i hate the fact that i have to stay in office for so long, hated the fact that i am talking on the phone everyday, the fact that i am in sales, and need to presuade people. Hated the most when i don't have enough money to do the things i want.

But i'm glad i know you, glad that you're with me. Loving you makes me forget all those hatred. So please, stop thinking that i've changed or doesn't prioritize you, cause i always do. It hurts the most when you think i don't care about you. Even tho there are times that im not doing the things that i used to do, but i do still think of you all the time..